Underneath Your Clothes
by Ayrton
Summary: How do you get a stodgy librarian to strip for you? Buffy gives it her best shot. Not quite the fic you'd expect!


UNDERNEATH YOUR CLOTHES

The first time he noticed something odd about her behavior towards him was in one of their Saturday work-outs in the library. She seemed distracted during his lecture on the technique of staking and he hadn't yet heard a single snide remark with which she usually undermined the graveness of what he wanted to convey.

She was brooding on something.

When he had come to the end of his speech he announced that she would be granted a holiday.  
Buffy _did_ notice that he had stopped talking and that made her look up to him from her pondering.

"Sorry, could you repeat the question?"

"I was just wondering what was wrong with you," he asked carefully.

She was going through a lot right now, with Angel being back. Maybe he had been a bit too hard on her when the Scooby's had found out. He had defended her actions in front of the others, but in the privacy of his office he had told her how he really felt.

That she was acting irresponsible towards her vocation and he had told her very clearly what he thought about the lack of respect she displayed for him. He was her Watcher, the man in which she should confide everything that was even remotely important to their cause and she had betrayed him by not telling him about Angel.

He knew of course why she had chosen to keep it to herself and after he'd heard her story about Angel being turned again, he even understood. Nonetheless he'd felt obliged to speak harsh words about her total lack of responsibility toward him and her duty. In retrospect he had perhaps been a bit too firm, but the fact that she'd so easily rushed back into the arms of a man who had tortured and almost killed her Watcher was something he would never understand.

Buffy gave him a long look but he saw her deciding that she wasn't ready to share her troubles with him yet.

"I'm okidoki!"

She hopped off the center table from which she had been not listening to his lecture and assumed a fighting position.

"Ready to get your ass kicked again, old-timer?"

"Are you trying to get a rise out of me?" He decided to leave it for now.

"Maybe if you wouldn't dress like an old-timer, you wouldn't fight like one." she suggested.

"There's nothing wrong with my attire."

"Seriously, Giles, wouldn't you feel more comfortable without all those layers of clothing? I mean it won't offend me if you take you shirt of once in a while."

"Excuse me?"

"I said I didn't mind if you went all manly on me and took off your shirt when we work out. "

" O, thank you. That's very kind of you. I will take your suggestion to heart and remember it next time hell freezes over.."

"Careful what you wish for, Giles. You are aware of the fact that we are standing on top of a Hellmouth? Stranger things have happened."

Some of the strange things that would happen in the course of the following week made it clear to him that she had been more than serious about his shirt.

-

The second time Giles was witness to odd behavior was when he was looking for a book in the stacks on Monday morning. It was Buffy's habit to report to him about the Sunday patrol and this morning she was accompanied by Faith. He heard them chatting - needless to say about boys- while they waited for him to show up. Giles halted when he heard Buffy ask the question.

"So, you think Giles is cute and young, eh?"

When Faith had first met Giles she'd made a comment about him being cute and having learned that the -sexual- morals of her colleague were rather different than hers, Buffy didn't put it past her to try to seduce Giles.

"Well compared to my watcher everyone looks cute and young, but yeah I bet he's got some sexy muscle hiding underneath all that clothing."

"Did you get a peak yet?"

"Come again?"

"At his ...naked body."

This coming from his slayer who went 'Eeeuuww' as soon as someone so much as hinted that Giles might be a normal human being underneath his librarian disguise..., Giles was truly intrigued.

"No. The guy's in love with his books. He wouldn't recognize a come-on if it bit him in the ass."

She did have a go then, but Buffy was relieved that it hadn't gone beyond that. She was very fond of Giles and rather liked her exclusive right to him. She had enough trouble dealing with the fact that her watcher had to divide his time between the two of them, now that he temporarily was assigned to a second slayer.

"He is cute though." Faith mused and the girls giggled knowingly when Giles appeared on the landing of the stairs. Buffy had the good grace to change the subject quickly. They spoke about their patrol weekend and Giles went through the week with them before Buffy went off to class.

-

That week there were several other attempts to find out about what lies beneath Giles' tweed outfit. One of them was rather embarrassing because Buffy spilled coffee over his shirt and Giles had to walk around in a one of Xander's sweaters that delicately depicted its wearer as HUNK.

When he was about to take off his stained shirt Buffy had unexpectedly entered his office on a silly pretense and had lingered about. He'd sent her away, lhad ocked the door and closed the shutters of his office before changing. Some people at school were already talking about the closeness between the school librarian and certain female student who could often be found in his company. Giles didn't want to put more fuel on the fire by getting caught half naked with Buffy in his office.

The truth about Buffy's behavior came out early one morning when the slayer found Giles asleep in the library. He had dozed off over research work in the early hours of the morning. They had patrolled together and his back had had an unfortunate encounter with the foot of a vampire. When he'd gotten back to the library to continue his work before school started he had undressed partly in order to be able to soothe a strained muscle in his back with a hot pack.

Giles lay slumped forward over the big table in the middle of the library. The shirt tails out of his trousers and in his sleep the shirt had been pushed up. It revealed a tiny part of the skin underneath.

Buffy couldn't resist.

He seemed sound asleep and she tiptoed closer, careful not to wake him. Her hand actually trembled a bit when she got hold of the striped cloth and carefully lifted it further up.

She froze solid when his voice startled her.

"I assure you that I am no longer asleep and ask you very urgently to stop what you're doing."

She straightened his shirt to cover the naked spot and sat down.

He looked up at her with sleepy eyes, puzzled, questioning.

"Can't blame a girl for trying."

"Trying what exactly?"

He found his glasses and put them on. Not his usual course of action when she made him feel uncomfortable. But this time he needed to study her face because she was acting so out of character that he almost began to suspect that he was dealing with an entirely different person.

He felt Buffy's discomfort and feared she would cop out again, but she did her best to give him a plausible explanation for her behaviour. Giles didn't believe one word of it.

"Well,...I'm interested in you..."

He was slightly disturbed when he noticed that she'd actually adopted one of his trademarks now; the stutter. "I..well..., we've known each other for such a long time now,..and I...I don't really, really know you, do I?"

"And?"

"And, I thought this is as good a time to start as any."

"And how does taking a peak underneath my clothing helps you to get to know me better?"

"Well, although you're a stodgy old librarian, some people actually find that sexy...and I was just trying to find out... if I was one of those... people."

"Buffy, contrary to what a certain slayer might think of me, I _do_ know a come-on especially when it's biting me in the...ass..." Buffy turned a shade redder. "...but, this is something entirely different. This is not you."

He rose and straightened his clothes, put the suspenders around his shoulders and grabbed his waistcoat and jacket from the chair.

"I'm going to freshen up a bit but when I come back I would very much like to hear what's been bothering you lately."

He reached out to her and lifted up her chin so she'd look him in the eye.

"And I won't take no for an answer, OK?"

She nodded guiltily and he left for the gym showers.

Giles returned to her in the library, washed and shaved and in his normal attire.  
She was sitting in the chair by the center table where he'd left her. The school bell rang, but she made no effort to get up to go to class. She looked so vulnerable and sad and Giles was really worried something might be very wrong with his Slayer. He sat down next to her.

"Your behavior recently has been very confusing."

"I know. And I'm sorry."

"What is it that you want from me, Buffy?"

She slowly lifted her head but she didn't look at him, eyes resting on his tie instead.

"I need to see your scars." she almost whispered it.

Giles felt a jolt of actual physical pain move trough his body.

"I have to see what Angelus did to you."

He looked at her in mild shock. Of all the things he had suspected this wasn't one of them. The subject of Angel torturing him had never been raised by either of them, apart from that one time when Giles had reminded her of it to make her see where her loyalties should be.

In the three months after the terrible ordeal Giles had healed before Buffy returned home. It seemed like nothing had ever happened. They had never spoken of it and as far as Giles knew, Buffy had not spoken to Xander about it and he was the only one who had seen all the horrible injuries Angel had inflicted upon him.

"Why?" he asked softly.

She looked at him with a sadness in her eyes that made his heart twist.

"Whenever I'm with Angel, everything is so wonderful and it makes me want to forget that we cannot have what we had just before he changed into Angelus. It's very hard to keep reminding myself of that. I know he did a lot of bad things, but it's so easy to forget when I'm in his arms. I am afraid that we might make the same mistake all over again and I need you to show me the result of Angelus' evil to keep me from making this mistake. I need to see what he did to you Giles. I need to know."

They sat silently for a moment before Giles rose and walked to the exit. He locked the door and then he headed toward his office, expecting Buffy to follow.

Slowly and full of fear for what might await her she followed him into the privacy of his office, where he stood with his back to her. He took off his jacket, hung it over the chair at his desk and began to unbutton his waistcoat.

With every layer of clothing, Buffy's anxiety grew. She hoped that the nightmares about the graveness of the wounds would be exaggerated. But her fearful anticipation played tricks on her mind and she fully expected to see a bloody mess of scars and blood on Giles' skin when he took of his shirt to reveal his naked back.

There was no bloody mess.

The surface of his back looked like a linoleum carving, though. A carving made by a toddler who had drawn lines randomly. The normal color of Giles' skin was hard to make out amidst the well healed pink scar tissue. Her knowledge of weapons gave her a fair idea of the tools that had been used. She recognized knife wounds, whiplashes, burns and scratches.

Buffy's heart bled for him. They'd gotten him out way too late.

She took a step toward him, wanting to touch the scars as if that would make the nightmare go away, but she lost courage when he stirred. Giles slowly turned around, giving her a view of the scars on his chest. Parts of his chest hair had been burned away, leaving a pinkish skin but she was spared another toddlers carving. When she understood that the burns were all part of one large tattoo-like caricature in the form of an angel with fangs, she couldn't help the tears from flowing.

Giles heart went out to Buffy. She stood motionless in front of him. Her whole world caved in and he had no words to express how sorry he felt for her. To know that the man you love was capable of such cruelty must be devastating to any human being.

Buffy took a deep sigh in an effort to get a grip on her emotions when Giles started undoing his belt buckle. The initial sexual implication was immediately replaced by one of terror and she steeled herself for what was about to come. His fingers were trembling while he worked open his trousers to reveal a huge pink scar right beneath his navel among the curly black hairs on his belly. It led straight down into his white briefs.

Buffy's hand went up to her mouth in shock.

"O my God, Giles, did he..."The rest of the sentence choked somewhere inside her throat.

Giles tried to sound very matter-of-factly when he spoke but he couldn't keep a tremble out of his voice.

"He didn't quite... manage to castrate me. " He couldn't look at Buffy when he spoke.  
"He...Angelus...said and I quote: 'I will leave your equipment in tact but I feel like mutilating it a bit, so it hurts whenever you want to use it and it will remind you of me.' He thought that was hilarious."

Buffy was too choked up to say something.

"It was my own fault, really," Giles said while tidying himself up. " In an attempt to distract him to win time I told him a great many lies about us."

"Us?"

"I told him you and I had been lovers for a long time and that that hadn't changed when you started dating him. It had the desired effect."

Giles voice cracked and he had to clear his throat before he could continue.

"He... became extremely angry and very nosy. He wanted to know all about it and I fed him lies... for as long as he could tolerate."

"He did that...because of me?" The question was one large sob.

Giles concentrated on buttoning his shirt, which still presented a challenge for him. Although his broken fingers had healed nicely, they were still stiff and clumsy.

He still didn't have the courage to look at Buffy. He felt her grief and it stabbed straight into his heart, but he hadn't really been dealing too well with the traumatic experience of the torture and had trouble keeping his own emotions under control. Revealing to Buffy the most humiliating thing that had ever happened to him in his entire life had taken all of his strength. He didn't think he would be capable of comforting her in her grief without breaking up himself; or worse: he might not be able to keep himself from showing his anger in front of her. He forced his voice to sound steady and calm when he assured her that it wasn't her fault.

"You mustn't feel guilty Buffy. It was my own doing and it probably saved my life. It may have mutilated me for the rest of my days, but it kept him distracted long enough so he wouldn't finish me off right then and there when I gave Drusilla the information about Acathla."

Buffy's body had switched to automatic while her mind was on the verge of a breakdown. She handed him his waistcoat and helped him with the buttons.

He allowed it.

He looked down at her sad face, wet with tears, upper lip trembling in an effort to suppress the other thousands that were on their way.

When she had finished with his waistcoat she stood in front of him as if in trance, head bowed, eyes still fixed on the job she had been doing, tears flowing down her cheeks again. He reached for a handkerchief in his pocket and handed it to her. She accepted it without a word. Neither of them spoke for what seemed like eternity. They just stood there; two people with broken souls, unable to help each other.

"Giles?"

Her voice was very controlled and soft when she looked up into his sad green eyes.

" May I hold you please?"

He opened his arms and she pressed herself against him, revelling in the warmth of his body. She tilted her head a bit so her left ear rested against his chest where she could hear the steady beat of his heart. She promised herself that she would take good care of this heart from now on. She would never betray it again and she would go out of her way to make sure that it would not stop beating while she was alive.


End file.
